Morgan

We're moving!

2007-07-19T21:40:00.000-07:00

Lucas is assisting with getting flawedartist.com up and running. Things should be live by the end of the week. w00t!

pownce

2007-07-06T16:20:00.000-07:00

My awesome friend Karen just send me an invite to Pownce, which is a new way to share things with your friends (Kinda like Twitter but on crack). If you already have an account, add me as a friend. Not on Pownce? I have a handful of invites...

In other news, I'm thinking about shutting this blog down and finally redoing my website. I'm behind the times, kids. And my old domain name was waaaaay too long.

Oh, and for those of you who have yet to see transformers, go see it. For nostalgia sake.

SF Pillow fight!

2007-02-13T11:06:00.000-08:00

This story was taken from Laughing Squid

It's baaaaaaaaaaack! I am TOTALLY going to be at this. Everyone come out and join in on the fun!

"The Instigator" of last years amazing Pillow Fight in San Francisco has informed us that it will be happening once again this Valentine's Day (Wednesday, February 14th) at Justin Herman Plaza. Here are photos from last year's Pillow Fight.

It's not Valentine's Day, it's PILLOW FIGHT Day!

Where: Justin Herman Plaza (Market & Embarcadero), San Francisco, CA.
When: Wednesday, February 14th, when the Ferry Building clock strikes 6pm.
What: PILLOW FIGHT!!!

How:

Tell everyone you know about Pillow Fight!
Tell EVERYONE YOU KNOW about Pillow Fight!!!
Nothing in your pillow but pillow.
Don't hit anyone with out a pillow.
Don't hit anyone operating a camera.

Last year's Pillow Fight was *amazing*! Let's make the magic happen again! Please bring a few trash bags to share and help pick up after wards.

Treasure hunt in the Castro

2007-01-21T11:54:00.000-08:00

For those of you who don't already know, I'm a pirate. Well, I like sailing and treasure hunts. The rum, not so much (I'm more of a champagne girl).

At any rate, I was bored Saturday night. Really bored. To the point where my choices we to start working at 7pm, or find something to do. Thankfully my good friend Brian responded to my text message and invited me out for drinks and dinner with some of his co-workers.

The evening began at Blondie's (which in my opinion is the only place to go in the city for a good martini). We hung out and waited for 9pm to roll around and enjoyed their "Deep Blue Funk". Yummy! By 9 we walked over to Limon to wait for the rest of the Facebook crew. By 9:20, we gave up, walked up and down the street trying to figure out what to do next.

It was at this point I had an idea. We go on a treasure hunt. And who are we to say what treasure we would find, other than we would know it when we found it. So, it was on to the Castro! Yarrrr!

Treasure #1: Dinner

We started walking, not sure if we were hungry or not. But more hoping to stumble onto something that seemed interesting. We walked up Church to Market and started looking into the windows of all the places we passed. It was decided that if we were to stay out and possibly drink, we should at least have something to eat. Initially we walked into Sweet Inspirations, but decided we needed real food so we walked into Lime. Just enough food to satisfy our stomachs (I need to say just how much I love the mini-burgers here) and just about $20 for three plates. Not too shabby!

Treasure #2 : Desert

I really wanted to go back to the bakery we were initially in just because the mouse looked so good and they seemed to have a good selection of tea. But Brian informed me of a Ice Cream place that had all sorts of interesting flavors (like Guinness Ice cream!?), so we headed over to Naia for some samples. Even though we had talked about getting cake, we ended up getting orange chocolate and dark chocolate ice cream. But while we were walking over there we noticed something else going on that looked promising.

Treasure #3 : Dancing!

What's this? Ladies night at The Bar On Castro? And only a $3 dollar cover change? Dude, count me in!! When Brian and I first walked I got a kick out of all the Lesbians dancing around and flirting with the teenish looking gay boys. Not to mention that they were practically streaming gay porn on the monitors. We hit the bar and I watched in horror/excitement as the bartender made my drink with 3 parts vodka, 1 part redbull. From here on out the night could only go two ways, really good or really really baaaad.

We walked around for a little bit, chatted with a few bar goers, and after I had enough of my *very* strong drink I felt like dancing. At which point I got to shake it with a beautiful girl by the name of Arwen. Brian and I left at a reasonable time, and very fulfilled with our hunt for fun on a Saturday night.

Everything I never said

2006-10-01T22:46:00.000-07:00

I don't think you realize just how much I miss you. You're at such a fragile state in your life and I no longer can just hop in my car and come pick you up when you need me. Even though I'm not in arms reach - I'm still here. I'll always be here for you when you need me.

---

I am so proud of you. You've accomplished so much in the past few years. I do wish I could have been there when you got the keys to your first house. You're such an amazing kid, far cooler than I'll ever be. And I'm so lucky to have you as family.

---

You are the reason I am where I am today. I have more respect for you then you could ever imagine. And to know that you've finally found someone who sees just how amazing you are makes me very happy.

---

There are lot of things that I never told you that I should have. However, in spite of everything that has happened, I hope you know how important you are to me. How much I loved you, how much I want to see you happy, how much you deserve to find someone to love just as much as I loved you.

[more to come]

Flickr!

2006-06-23T22:36:00.000-07:00

I finally broke down and got a Flickr account. So take a look!

YouTube surfing

2006-06-17T10:28:00.000-07:00

Here's a selection of some of the videos I've been watching on YouTube!

Come here often?

2006-06-16T23:03:00.000-07:00

What a fucking whirl wind these past few months have been.... I don't even know where to start.

Picking up where we left of is a good starting point. Let's try that, shall we?

The boy:

It feels like things ended almost as quickly as they started. Things were great, then things started to settle, things started to turn bad, and I was left with a very difficult decision. But I'm positive I made the right one. I can't really find the words right now to describe how any why it ended (eh, I probably wouldn't post that here anyways).

The work:

It's improved. Some. I came up with a plan of attack, executed it, and have finally been able to come up for air to re-claim my weekends. No more working 60+ hours a week, no more stressing myself out to the point exhaustion. I figured that if I kept going at the rate that I was I would get so burnt out that I'd end up hating my job, quitting, and what worse, never want to work for a start up again. NOT GOOD. I love my job. And if I want to be of any use to anyone when I go into the office, I need to set some standards for myself and follow through on them. And things have paid off, we're back to having a manageable work load, and I'm finally able to do some of the things I've been wanting to do for the past 3 months. Yippee!

The NSA Reunion:

Was awesome! Richard, my very first boyfriend, was my date. Got to see a lot of people I haven't seen in ages. We even ended up running over to the old school, silly and drunk, and ran around telling stories. Got to see all of my family, meet my moms new boyfriend, hand out with my brother, and just relax for a little bit. When I got back I treated myself to a massage and a day of watching TV and movies. Yum.

Venice Beach:

Cyan and Misty dragged my away from the office to hit the beach for the weekend, and oh what a weekend it was! Friday night was reserved for dining and relaxing in the hot tub. Saturday was spent at the beach and Santa Monica Pier, and Sunday we hit Universal Studios. Check out Cyan's flickr photos!

Jody's Wedding:

*blink* It was last minute, and for a little bit I was afraid I wouldn't make it out of Mexico alive! But I did, and we had a lot of fun. Got to see the World Cup game while we were there too.

What's coming up?

Tomorrow night I'm going to see Verdi’s Requiem with Cyan, Lucas, and Scott. w00t! I will be at my first ever San Francisco PRIDE next weekend, and Fatigo's coming to town!!! They're playing at the Hemlock Tavern June 27th and at Brainwash the 28th. I can't wait to see my old friends and listen to some good tunes!

That's all I got for now kids. What this girl needs more than anything at the moment is a little sleep. Night!

Phone pics! Yay!

2006-03-21T13:55:00.000-08:00

A little romatic history. Err.. herstory

2006-03-11T14:05:00.000-08:00

The word Relationship can have a plethora of meanings. The main one people tend to think about involves Love. More specifically, love for a significant Other.

To date I've been in 5 relationships where I've said "I love you". But in each situation, the exact meaning an instensity of that phrase was slightly different. Let me see if I can explain...

Richard

I met Richard my first year of High School. This guy was far from the typical 17-18 year old. He actually came to school wearing suits. He was a music composition major. He adored Philip Glass. In my 14-year-old eyes, he was fucking perfect. I was so young and inexperienced (in every sense of the word), and he seemed so grown up. So cultured. Sophisticated. He was my first everything (by everything, I mean my first kiss all the way up to my first time). But after about 8 months, things started getting rough. He was diagnosed with Schizotypal Personality Disorder, started getting paranoid, and I didn't know how to handle it.

The love I had for Richard was very innocent. You're first love always is. You hope that it's going to last forever, but then you realize this kind of love isn't about getting married and having kids. It's about experience. I learned a great deal from it. And we're still friends even after it all.

Danielle

By the time I had met Danielle, I was comfortable with that fact that I might be a lesbian. I had dated other girls, kissed them, but hadn't gone farther than 2nd base. I was actually seeing this really cool girl when I first started hanging out with her, and therefore, wasn't too interested in getting involved. Which was fine, she had a boyfriend at the time.

So we became friends. Reagan and I stopped seeing each other, her boyfriend moved to Sacramento, and that's when things started to get interesting. Even though I had kind of had a thing for who I thought was her ex-husband, I developed a crush on her, which I ended up admitting to. We began dating, fell in love within a matter of a month or two, and started toying with the idea that maybe this was it. The Big It. I was saving up for a ring even. Then I got an angry email from who I thought was her ex-boyfriend to stay the fuck away from his fiancé. Words cannot describe the pain I felt. She had deceived me. She had twisted so many truths and I believed her. I believed her when she told me I was the one she was going to grow old with.

While I was madly in love with her, the majority of the relationship was build on a elaborate web of tales that were anything but the truth. What I took from that relationship, Honesty and Trust are two very very important factors.

Michael

I had met Michael through Vince way back in early 2001. Michael and I were both beatniks, had the same taste in women, and got along famously. In the early days, I would have never even considered dating him. I was, after all, gay. But because we were so similar, we became really good friends as well. Things changed after visiting him at Bookmans one day after I had been dumped by Danielle for the second time (ugh, that's another long story...). I started sleeping with Michael because I was lonely and I didn't see any romantic potential. He, in my book, was safe. But then again, you can't try to control your feelings.

Eventually, we started dating. I moved in. And Life seemed wonderful. Our similarities made the relationship very even toned and comfortable. But that's not to say I didn't know what I had signed up for. To make a long story short, he didn't have a job and ended up cheating on me. The whole situation left a bitter taste in my mouth for a very long time. That's not to say we aren't still friends after it all though, and for that I'm thankful.

While I didn't see longevity, I enjoyed how comfortable that relationship was. But along with Honesty and Trust being important, you've also got to be able to support yourself. Distrust will surely tear two people apart, but the whole money issue will add a fuck ton of salt to a wound.

Lucas

I had never met anyone quite like Lucas. He was extremely independent, very intelligent, and unlike a lot of geeks I've know, actually liked getting out of the house. Falling in love with him was a bumpy and lengthy journey. But it happened. And the more he pushed me away, the closer I forced myself to him. I will admit that I turned into a person I wasn't very fond of in that relationship. I became dependant, lost a great deal of self-esteem, and felt myself closing off.

The problem with him was the fact that we didn't communicate. I didn't feel like I could disclose, and when I did, I got nothing in return. It was heart breaking. He's a wonderful man, but loving him was a difficult task.

Sergio

Ok, I do have a set of rules in place for dating. I like meeting people through friends. I've never been into meeting people at bars or at large social events. I like being friends before I date someone. Usually when you meet someone and you know right off the bat that you’re interested you don't tend to truly be yourself. When romance does come into the equation, I like waiting at least a month before sleeping with them and after that it usually takes a good 3 months before falling in love.

Sometimes rules are made to be broken.

5 day after the first kiss we slept together. 3 days after that, we admitted to being completely in love with each other. Usually this can be chopped up to that initial new relationship excitement. But not this time. I am in Love. It's something that I have honestly never experienced in my life. It's wonderful, amazing, and scary as fuck (I would either be lying or bat shit crazy if I didn't admit to being scared. But keep in mind that we're always nervous or frightened when we're feeling something completely and totally new).

I also usually have a sense that something isn't going to last. When dating, I don't tend to think about how this relationship will affect my future, I have a good sense that things will end sooner or later. As of right now, I don't have that feeling at all. It's exciting. And I'm very interested in seeing what develops.

... Love is a strange beast. It's interesting to see how one emotion can feel so different depending on who it's shared with. Each time you fall in love, it's a new experience. Lessons are learned, you become more aware each time with what you want, and it helps shape us.

meme musing

2006-03-11T02:40:00.000-08:00

So, it's late. I should be sleeping right now but instead I'm checking Slide emails and reading at my friends blogs. And while no one tagged me, I still feel like doing this meme I found on Sergio's blog. Sue me, I'm bored

Four Jobs I’ve Had:

1. Barista
2. Camera Repair girl
3. Cisco Networking Academy Support Specialist
4. Slide Support Goddess (Yea, that's my official title)

Four Movies I Can Watch Over and Over:

1. Bleu
2. Kill Bill (Vol.1 and 2 can count as "1" movie, right?)
3. Secretary, when I'm feeling naughty (which is quite often)
4. I Heart Huckabees

Four Places I’ve Lived:

1. Boise, Idaho
2. Mesa, Arizona
3. Phoenix, Arizona
4. San Francisco, California

Four TV Shows I Love to Watch:

1. MythBusters
2. The L Word
3. The Wire
4. Daily Show

Four Places I’ve Been on Vacation:

1. New York
2. Rocky Point, Mexico
3. Sailing around Catalina
4. Chicago

Four of My Favorite Dishes:

1. Tofu scramble
2. Soy taco
3. Anything involving crepes
4. Eggs benedict

Four Websites I Visit Daily:

1. Slide!
2. MySpace (I know I'm incredibly un-cool for admitting to it, but I'm used to being un-cool. So fuck off!)
3. Overcaffinated (What can I say. The boy's sexy, and pretty damn funny!)
4. ThinkGeek

Four Places I Would Rather Be Right Now:

1. Anyplace that doesn't involve me listening to my upstairs neighbor have sex
2. France (I hear the champaine and cheese are amazing!)
3. At a Fatigo concert
4. SxSW (Fuckers!)

Four bloggers who I’m tagging as “it”:

1. Heidi (This is assuming you still blog every now and then)
2. Jeannette
3. Cliffe
4. Vince

In other news, works crazy, things with the boy are fucking amazing, and I suck at saving money for my new TV. More when I'm actually awake.

"Love Life"

2006-02-23T12:27:00.000-08:00

It's funny when you move to a new place. You settle in, make new friends, meet people, and if your single, you start dating. It's natural. Everyone does it. And it's fun.

Since moving here I've had to deal with this dating thing a great deal. For a while it left my in this state of utter confusion about what I should do. Should I just stay single, or should I pick one and start dating? Let's start with the candidates, shall we?

The Ex-Boyfriend:

When I moved here, he was kind enough to let me stay with him. Use his shower, sleep in his bed, eat his food, etc. And even though there was still a good amount of residule stuff, I was very good. There was hugging, but no kissing. There was cuddling, but no sex. There was a bit of flirting, but no "I love you" was ever mentioned.

The Forbidden Romance:

Something that was initially thought of as a one night stand turned into anything but. I was nervous about the situation we were in, and I was never entirely sure about what we were until it ended. I cared about him, I wanted a relationship, but that just didn't happen.

The Girl:

She's become a good friend. I didn't want to ruin that. And even if I had been interested, I know a 'Relationship' was not exactly what she had in mind.

The Friend:

My ideal situation for sparking up a relationship is to make a friend, get to know that person, and in the beginning it's really just a friendship. That's it. Someone to talk to, hang out with, watch movies with, bitch about love to. Whatever. It's Platonic. And then out of the blue, something happens. This is a person that you think

You know, this guy is so fucking awesome. Why doesn't he have a girlfriend

Why don't you ask them out?

Well, we're friends.

SO?

And after a few beers and a good movie spent cuddling and nervously holding hands, there's a kiss. It's hard to tell who leaned in first, but it's happening, and you're not about to stop it.

Aren't we fucking cute?

I need to grow thicker skin...

2006-02-10T14:00:00.000-08:00

I have been so overwhelmed with this feeling of sadness for the past few days. I totally picked the wrong time to quit smoking, its making something that should be fairly easy relatively hard. Seeing him every day has been very awkward, even though I've been good about putting on a happy, friendly face around him. It makes me feel terrible, like I'm lying to him…

On a good note : 3 days and no cigarette. And it’s Friday. I get to see Brian this weekend, we’ll get going to a concert and doing dinner.

That’s all I got right now. Bah.

Moving right along...

2006-02-09T10:28:00.000-08:00

What a whirl wind these past two days have been. Monday I moved into my new place (yay!), and because I promised myself I would quit smoking once I moved in, I finished my pack on Tuesday and yesterday was my first full day without smoking. Of course what made this task very difficult was the fact that I had The Talk with the guy I'd been seeing. And to top it all off, I got my period! I felt like beating things, chewing off all my nails, pulling out all of my hair... Granted I didn't, but I sure as hell thought about it.

However, I am resolved not to let this upset me. I will not hold onto this thing, what ever it was, in hopes that in a few months we'll both be in a position to where we can pick up with where we left off. That would be very foolish of me, not to mention the fact that I would almost certainly be hurt if I held on. I am not a foolish person (for the most part).

We'll see how well this works.

Coming 127.0.0.1

2006-02-05T16:42:00.000-08:00

Ok, first off, I'm not good at blogging. I've tried to keep several journals and they always turn into just documenting what I've been doing. I'll admit I'm not very good at writing down my feelings. I think the last time I tried doing that was when I was in grade school, but my mom ended up reading through it. I'll open up to my friends when I have stuff that I need advice on, but for the most part, that's it. This book is closed kids, and if the key you have doesn't fit, then you're better off not even trying.

I don't trust people easily, which probably had a lot to do with it. But, we'll see if we can't work on that. I'm starting out in a new city. A lot has changed over the past year... Broke up with Lucas, whom I loved very dearly. But I never got a strong impression those feelings were really returned. At least not at the same pace. He was a very closed person. And that's what eventually lead to the break up. We rarely talked about anything that had to do with how we were feeling, and what was going wrong. When he left for San Francisco at the end of August, it reminded me that not matter how to try to avoid it, things change. People change. And we had changed a great deal over the 2 years we spent together.

A few months after he moved, so did I. Not to follow him, but because this was something I needed to do for myself. I had been trying to get to San Francisco on my own since I was 17. And finally I had gotten myself to a point where it was either move out of Arizona, or stay and die there. Don't get me wrong, there are things about Phoenix I do miss, but with all the changes I'd been through, what better way to start out this new direction than in a City I've always wanted to call Home.

Tomorrow I move into my own place. This is the first apartment I've had to myself since I was 19. Words cannot express how grateful I am that I can actually afford a 1 bedroom apartment in the heart of San Francisco only 4 short blocks from work.

Definitely off to a good start.